When our side started in 1992, we set out, quite deliberately, to maintain the informality and basic fun of the Morris
We do not take ourselves too seriously. We can't.
At various times, we have found ourselves labelled as the Geriatric Morris, and, less reverentially, the Menopausal Morris. It should be added that these labels emanate from within the side.
We take some sort of perverse pride in the fact that our average age might well exclude people like Bill Clinton and Tony Blair from membership on the grounds of excessive youth.
Those of you with a Morris background should understand that we do not claim to be choreographed perfectionists, much as we admire those sides which are. Our capers are more virtual than real, and our lines are not always straight.
That is not to say that we set out deliberately to dance badly: far from it; and we don't think we dance badly, either. Many of our members have achieved a good level of proficiency. But we accept our limitations and dance for the fun of it. We practise regularly and encourage newcomers to join in from an early stage, rather than have to pass through some sort of extended apprenticeship.
Away from the stereotypes of irritating, bell-jangling and over-drinking buffoons, we also enjoy the après-dance conviviality of the English village pub.
John "Doods" Suttle, the self-appointed mayor of South Glemsford, one of those who refuses to reveal his age on the grounds that he might be arrested for avoiding call up in World War Two, also has a range of material and can be persuaded to play guitar as well.
The Men(updated 11 May 2004, with some extra revisions, 1 January 2007):