It is, as mentioned elsewhere, a contractual pre-requisite of membership of The Morris Men of Little Egypt that some previous biographical details should be published here, just so we can tell whence the Men are coming, and how much the Membership alters them and their outlook.
Sometimes, however, what is told to the Vetting Committee is so outlandish, and the names of the protagonists so exotic,
that the entry is passed "on the nod" in paroxysms of demonic giggling, and without further ado.
This is one such example.
Crawford is an interloper from a far away county (East Sussex) who has travelled far and wide and decided that he will settle, for a while, in Suffolk.
He first got into Morris dancing a number of years ago after an Oxfordshire side, called the Icknield Way Morris Men, used a form of an addictive narcotic drug (2-hydroxy-3-pintabeer) to trick him into joining.
This drug causes the unwitting recipient to practise Morris dancing once a week and spend time in a number of pubs that extend their hospitality far past the regulation time.
His epic cross-Britain migration, which will surely end in him returning to his home county to retire in Eastbourne, continues and currently he resides to Suffolk.
He found that his addiction was a little difficult to shake off, so Green Dragon Morris in Bury St Edmunds promised to feed his habit.
After being the squire of said side, during which time he spent approximately ten minutes as the ‘Chief Morris Dancer of all England’ and appearing on the front cover of the Ely Star under the banner headline ‘Tractor Menace’, he decided that a side using sticks alone was not satisfying his full Morris credentials and as such he wanted to regain his use of the hankie.
Therefore after an exhaustive search for a side that would meet his stringent criteria, he gave up and joined Little Egypt, probably because of their excessive use of the aforementioned substance.
It needs to be pointed out, however, that Crawford's initiation to the secrets of Little Egypt was carried out, with due ceremony, offshore, as far back as 2002.
Discreet details of the event may be found here, but you'll have to wait for Dan Brown's next book to find out what didn't really happen.