The Angel and Around: November 2004.
Thanks again to my regular correspondents for keeping this area of the site alive!
I don't wish to destroy the anonymity of the media, and I do wish to maintain the convention of not revealing my sources,
but it has to be recorded somewhere that
Neil Porter, previously "The Young Whippersnapper", and lately just "'Snapper", is
intending to follow in the footsteps of Van Diemen and his ancestors to the land of Fosters, merino sheep and
that mad Irwin bloke who wrestles salties and funnel webs.
Showing no signs of looking at all "grumpy",
Neil has contributed these further gems for your perusal.
- I'm now back full-time resident in Glemsford following a 7 year absence; the preparations for Down Under
continue, I am now a registered nurse in 2 countries
and am currently filling in immigration forms.
- Dave Hill has a new dog, Jess, a 2 year old Boxer.
- The Crib team have won 3 on the trot, including an
away win at the Cock...
- Kebab Night continues to flourish. Rumours that Porous has been sighted bringing in knife, fork and trough
are unfounded; further rumours that he claims to Pauline to be either a) "just nipping out for a quick
one" or b) "just giving some photos to Doods" are utterly without corroboration
- Mother has shaved off his beard but retained a
moustache which gives him a somewhat rakish air reminiscent
of Leslie Phillips
- Aunty Wainwright recently celebrated her 60th
birthday. In a drastic break with tradition she was
seen to have been drinking Gin and Tonics rather than
the more customary Tia Maria.
Needless to say though
the bottles on Kevin's 'top shelf' took a battering.
However, not all tradition was thrown out, and the old
Angel custom of 'table surfing' to the strains of the
Beach Boys was observed.
Next up is Tony Ward's 60th
(I expect a blow by blow account of THAT one, although, come to think of it, I can probably write the script now.Ed.)
- Porcus Rex is currently scheduled to make his next
appearance on Christmas Eve
- ...and finally, Tony Ward is persona non grata at the
Suffolk Yacht Club. Details are sketchy but excessive
swearing is believed to be involved.
I honestly find this difficult to believe. Apart from anything else,
your average member of the Suffolk Yacht Club wouldn't understand a word Tony said.
He has, after all, developed his
own version of the English language which places one
particular Anglo-Saxon expression into every possible grammatical function, even some***ing times using it the mid***ingdle of any word.
Thanks, 'Snapper. Please ensure that an Antipodean diary is sent occasionally for insertion. Your readership expects ...
Meanwhile, I do have other correspondents, one of whom tells me:
- You may have heard that there was a big fire last week at the factory in
Bury St. Edmunds that makes Branston pickle.
Predictably, the shelves at Tesco were empty of it by Thursday,
but there was lots of Tesco's own brand, which is probably exactly the same!
The same day, we heard on BBC Look East that a jar of Branston had been auctioned on E-bay for 56 pounds!
The quiz started on Sunday 7 November, and we played at home to the Black Lion.
The Angel won, 59-52. As usual with the Lion, the leading team teetered back and forth during the match.
We also won the beer leg, which consisted of 20 questions.
This season, there are 10 rounds, plus the beer leg,
and the questions were quite difficult, in fact, we started to lose the will to live by the end of round eight!
A company in Wales is running it, so we had better get the atlas out and find out where 'it' is, as they will doubtless throw in a few gems
that are close to their dear little hearts!
I have also received some photos of the Annual Angel Beer Festival in Belgium.
They seem to have enjoyed themselves.
Here are four of them to whet your appetite:
There will be more!