The Angel Went to Belgium: Autumn 2004


and some of them came back

Where it all began Why are we doing this?

In a successful repeat of last year's venture, a select band of Angel regulars, artists and hangers-on clambered aboard their "Executive Transport"
and headed for Belgium.

Why is everybody looking at me?

This renewed effort at Trans-Manche collaboration was another resounding success ...


... as this pictorial record of the event proves.

I know how to have a good time ... I just wear a silly hat

I know where I'm going I know who's going with me

As with all tours,
certain rules have to be applied.
This one was no different:

And we'll have fun ...

Rule No. 1:
Do not let the camera catch you glassless.

I know what I love ... ... and that's all white and frothy

Where am I? Where have I just come from?

Rule No. 2:
Never look at the camera ...

Rule No. 3:
... unless Kevin has offered to buy you a drink,
in which case,
smile sweetly

Who am I? What am I doing here?

Now listen very carefully ...  ... he will say this only once ...

Rule No. 4:
Humour the natives - you never know when we may have to invade.
Rule No. 5:
Always assume the patron is being friendly if he smiles at you.

Am I really doing this?

Rule No. 6:
Try to ignore little green men standing on your neighbour's head;
such hallucinations can be an effect of drinking from a dirty glass
Rule No. 7:
Don't assume all the natives are friendly;
some of them, understandably, will be very, very scared.

Welcome, bienvenue, wilkommen We are so pleased to see you

I knew I shoulda stayed at hoom I've heard of pissholes in the snow ...

Rule No. 8:
Sensible headgear is to be worn at all times
Rule No. 9:
This applies in particular to the landlord, who should not succumb to the invitation:
"Do you want to drink your beer, or wear it?

Well ... she asked me ... would you like to WEAR your beer or drink it?

Rule No. 10:
Act normally; try not to make a spectacle of yourselves

Red eye reduction just doesn't work for this lot My only hero is Elton John

No, 'onest, 'and on 'eart ... Where it all ends ...

Rule No. 11:
Beware the attention of local Lotharios;
they're only after one thing.
Rule No. 12:
Always remember, you have invested a good deal of money to cultivate this figure;
don't throw it all away with one unwise seafood starter

See? It always works out ...

Rule No. 12:
Correct uniform WILL be worn at all times;
penalties will be severe;
Paula will conduct regular checks.

A worthwhile investment Whose bright idea was this, anyway?


ęSteve Clarke, steve@little-egypt.org.uk 09 November 2005